Dis Raps For Hire Episode 9: Joan



"Joan" is the ninth installment in the Dis Raps For Hire series. The comment that inspired the video comes from the YouTube user thegreenskeletor, against a trailer park manager, Joan.

Comment
"Lloyd, Bro. I have gne through a divorce, fought alcoholism, and fought to finaly have custody back of my 5 year old little girl. For the last year and a half, have been living in a mobile home I bought, with 3 bedrooms and two baths so that I could provide﻿ a home for myself and my daughter. The Trailer trash park maager never liked me because I'm young, I'm not married, and my father had to help me qualify to live in the park because divorce bankrupted me. Ever since I moved here, this bitch Has harassed me, threatened to evict me for not pulling weeds that just sprouted, and shit like﻿ that. Well, now she has done it... she has sent me an eviction notice and I have no idea what I'm gonna do. She looks like barbara bush with a bad litte orphan Annie dyed granny fro, and she has to constantly adjust her crusty lips so her teeth don't fall out. Make my day brother. Clown this bitch so I can at least have the last laugh Hey Bro, by the way, that bitch's name is Joan" - thegreenskeletor

Lyrics
Bro, double L-O comin' back to flow again

So this fellow can exact some cold revenge

On this lady who attacks his home and fam

With harassment and eviction plans.

It's another of these tales, wanna make your bones shudder:

Single father who's providing for himself and his daughter

Getting tossed to the curb 'cause he's short a few dollars!

Mr. Green, let me go ahead and make your day, brother!

Lady, you won't like me, and that's my point precisely,

So adjust your chops, put your teeth in, and bite me!

You'd bring a landfill to a standstill! You're so trailer trash!

I'll dump you in the garbage out back of this 3 bedroom, 2 bath!

And them crusty-ass lips make me wanna throw up!

Looks like you just ate a whole box of powdered donuts! Yuck!

And now I can't help it. I gotta rippin' bitches addiction for shizza,

But damn it, lady, you're stealing time from my chess game with the RZA!

Fought bankruptcy; he fought for custody,

Fought through divorce and to get into recovery, and suddenly,

He's faced with this drudgery! You're outmatched, you dumb bat!

He's ready to scrap! You're just old and ugly!

And other cats who are dads would act just like him

'Cause it might have been them, had their families threatened,

And if it was me, ya tried to remove yours truly,

I'd turn that motherfucking park into a Rambo movie!

I don't bust gats! I don't clap 9's!

I'm strapped with Dis Rap lines that'll snap your spine!

Chapter nine coming at cha! Dis Raps action!

Spittin' to give just one dude some satisfaction!

I'm battling back for Skeletor, who got ousted!

Storming the castle and taking back his snake mountain!

What's the big deal? His pops hadda help him qualify!

He's young and has a child; at least he didn't lie!

Here's a guy trying to put his life back on straight!

You're lucky he didn't take his mobile home and drive away!

So pull your own weeds, Joan, you ho,

With your Barbara Bush-looking orphan Annie granny fro!

I hope my words haunt you and that you'll never forget,

And they linger over your head like bad credit card debt!

I'm no joke, but I'll have the last laugh on the grounds,

So honk your nose, you old cow, 'cause you just got clowned!

Trivia
This is the first DRFH with a closing segment after the rap.