Dis Raps For Hire Episode 6: James



"James" is the sixth installment of the Dis Raps For Hire series. The comment that inspired the video comes from a Facebook user known as Simon, against his brother, James.

Comment
Simon -

"Hi Mr Lloyd

''My name is Simon, I live in the UK and work for a large international bank. Thats my background.''

''This is - my bro, Jim (James), hasn't had a job for like 10 years. Ever since he quit his job he's been leeching off of me. Rent, taxes, bills - you name it. He doesn't even try to find a job or claim job seekers allowance or any benefits.''

''If it were anyone else they would have got kicked out long ago, but alas he's my twin brother with nowhere else to go. So it's hard for me.''

''I'm not on massive wages, really quite the opposite. I barely scrape by yet he doesn't give a shit and if I moan, we fight.''

I'm that depressed - diss the fuck out of him, hopefully he'll change his ways.

''Cheers dude. I'm a huge fan."''

Lyrics
I grind Brit dead beats to dead meat for pissin' around!

It's Mr. Lloyd, chap, and that's my friggin' background!

ALAS! You lazy shit! Now you've gone and inspired

The sixth chapter of Dis Raps for Hire!

I'm here to diss the fuck out leech punks 'cause they bloody suck! (Yup!)

You wanna free-load? Then you can latch onto my nuts!

How do you live with yourself, Jim? Oh yeah, you don't 'cause you're broke! (Nope!)

And you sap rent, taxes and bills from your bro! (Ooh!)

Well, it's over now! EpicLLOYD's of London come to town! (What!)

Listen to your brother: Simon says, "Get the fuck up!"

I'll flame James, shame James, shady brother, gane James!

I'll defame James, maim James; this is lame, James!

Calls himself Jim 'cause he's too lazy for James! (James!)

Not working the bank, but you need to make some change, man!

Crashing on couches, no job seekers' allowance.

You coward! Go out and earn some of your own cash to play around with!

I'm not on massive wages, but I'll give you some massive poundage!

The worst part about it, for Simon, is that you're his twin!

Holy shit, man! Where to begin?

You even leeched his goddamn DNA off of him!

But it's okay; you must be fraternal. That's easy to see, though.

Simon's Schwarzenegger. You're clearly Danny DeVito!

And I've heard the talk: ten years of looking hard for jobs,

But the last time you got one, Tony Blair was in office!

And it's not the money, man! Most folks are happy to help!

Showing thanks by sitting around is how the disrespect is felt!

This is a wake-up call from across the pond! I'm dropping bombs!

So thick diss had to stick an extra 's' on!

So what's your problem, Jim? Your brother is such a great guy!

Won't say goodbye, even though the bloke can barely scrape by!

And you won't even try to find a job, you sloth asshole!

At least when ho's go broke, they learn to work the pole!

So fight, Simon! And if he moans he's got nowhere else to go,

Tell him to try hell! Maybe he can crash on they floor!

Oh, don't act that depressed, man! Just make a move on this mooch,

Or this douche will continue to use you and your flat 'til you do!

But whatever you choose, you better get move on it soon,

'Cause when he hears this, living together is gonna get real awkward for you.

Cheers, dude!

Trivia
This is the first DRFH where a comment has come from a place other than YouTube. (Facebook)