Dis Raps For Hire Episode 1: Charles



"Charles" is the first installment in the Dis Raps For Hire Series. The comment comes from the YouTube user aysharpietwintip13, against the user's brother, Charles.

Comment
The comment that started this Dis Rap comes in two comments.

"My brother says that L-Verse song doesn't count as being a verse with all L's. His name is Charles, please destroy him in a rap." - aysharpietwintip13

"I asked you to destroy my bro in a rap, here's some info. He's 15, he has a moustache, he grunts instead of answering, he wears black and he hates Chuck Norris. He tries to rap, he thinks that Things 1 and 2 were weak, he's a jerk who always has to throw the last punch! His food can't touch, he doesn't like cheese, potatoes, mayo, or most condiments, (i thought i'd throw that in). And don't think I'm hatin' him, it's just that he's a jerk and i want to get back at him just once for all the things he did to me. He's probably gonna hit me once he hears it, but it'll be worth it! PLEASE!"- aysharpietwintip13

Lyrics
Your time on earth as a bully is about to officially expire

'Cause you've been targeted for destruction by Dis Raps For Hire!

I hear you've been a dick to your brother aysharpietwintip.

Well, EpicLLOYD's arrived to exact a little bit of his vengeance!

I promise, you're gonna dislike every one of these comments

Like you do cheese, potatoes, mayo, and most condiments!

That's your brother, man. Why do you have to be such a big jerk?

You better answer me and stop grunting like one of them pigs from Angry Birds!

I'll rip your arms off like a Wookie and then eat 'em for lunch,

Then watch you flop around on the ground tryin' to throw that last punch.

I'm gonna mangle you, Charlie, and spill out all of your guts,

Then serve them to you on a plate making sure the different pieces never touch!

It doesn't bother me that you don't like Thing 1 or Thing 2 that much.

I think Charles here is just mad that no one ever calls him Chuck!

And plus, if something I wrote was a type of style that you loved,

I'd have to burn it 'cause that means all the lyrics I came up with sucked!

You got no business sporting facial hair. That's just ridiculous!

You're not done growing yet! That mustache is probably bigger than your dick is!

And your clothes are so goth, I can't even see where you go!

Walking around like some kind of 15-year-old version of The Crow!

I'll say this clearly once and make sure not to stutter:

Quit fricking picking on your little younger brother!

So sharpie, when you see him, go ahead and blow him a kiss,

But then raise your fists in self defense 'cause your on your own after this!

That's it!

Trivia

 * This is the only Dis Raps where two comments have inspired the video.